a love letter

seems time to speak of my life-long love and mistress, mary-jane.

we first met in the big city, i fell hopelessly head over heels almost immediately.
she was everything i could hope for or dream of.
she made me laugh, smile, took me places i couldn't have imagined.
when she and i were at one, the universe seemed in perfect order.
at first there were others, but i soon realized she was the only one for me.
if i grieve, and indeed i do, it's for her, the one who, when all others seemed not to care, was always there to comfort and console me....to ease my troubled mind and heart.
without whom i would surely not be here, she saved me, again and again, and seemed to want nothing in return, only just to stay together, til death did us part.
we were not always together, but we most certainly found each other again and again and again.
i will always remember those wonderful days and nights, when love was in it's full and hearty bloom, those times seemed as though they would last forever.

UNTIL.....

the time came to end the affair....what had been so sweet and nurturing had turned to bitter poison.
i saw that to stay would be to die.
she was willing for me to stay, calling me to death, wanting only to take me to the grave,
she did not want our relationship to end.

when we parted, i often heard her haunting calling, whispering for me to join her where she dwelled.
i wanted so much to follow her, it was so painful to have to choose to let her go.

i sit here now, in calm and welcome solitary ease, thinking of her with grateful fondness.
we were together for a reason, i'm alive to prove that true, and i'm glad she's laid to rest in peace.

she had led me
to the gate
she was always
pointing the way
i just wasn't ready
to choose to see
now i know
no need to wonder
where i go is where
i know she'll be.

we'll be together
there again, no doubt,
with no more need
for longing or desire
we'll be as one again
embracing in the dance
of the one and only
everlasting fire.