mission from god

enroute home from a noon AA meeting today, encountered 2 young fellows while in my favorite sandwich shop.
they were dressed in the familiar seedy suits and scuffed shoes of "christians" on a mission from god, with nametags declaring they were of the "latter day saints" variety.
one of them invited me to join them for lunch, and much to my surprise, i responded in the affirmative.

i do confess to a long-standing prejudice regarding "christians" on a mission from god.

the little from history books i had actually absorbed while trapped within schoolhouse walls, had taught me that a whole HELL of a lot of suffering had been wrought in the world throughout the centuries by "christians" on a mission from god !

during our extended conversation, of course it was me doing most of the talking, i was reminded of a profound life experience that forever altered my perspective on the "god / man" i was taught to call "lord jesus christ".

at age 7, one friday afternoon, i found myself approaching the minister at the local church where i attended sunday school.
he had previously offered to facilitate a ritual for any of us children who wished to "take the lord jesus christ into our hearts as our personal saviour".
with life being a living hell at home, i was willing to try anything that might offer hope of salvation from the horror and terror of existence under my father's iron rule.
the minister was kindly supportive in guiding me through a simple ceremony inviting the "lord jesus christ" into my heart.
i remember feeling quite optimistic on the short journey home, perhaps this would be the hoped-for magical cure for life's perpetual suffering, as well as my father's unpredictable, cruel and abusive temperament.

it was not to be, of course, but with the resiliency of a 7 year old, i soon determined to return that next friday afternoon, knowing the minister would be there at this time.

i remember that moment as if it was this morning, as i hurriedly entered his office, bluntly exclaiming, "can we try that thing again, it didn't work !"

with a subtle smile, the minister graciously led me through the ritual one more time.

still the same result....no change in my father's attitude or behaviour.

IT DIDN'T WORK !!!

that was all i needed to be convinced that this "lord jesus christ" was a phony, and that "christianity" was nothing but a sham.
from this 7 year old's point of view, any hope of rescue from the purgatory of my home, certainly did not lie within the confines of christianity, church, or anything to do with this character known as "lord jesus christ" !

at the time of this writing, i maintain a neutral view regarding dogma of any kind.