monkey-shines

1998....
while touring india....
exploring rishikesh
a popular hindu pilgrimage site
along the banks of holy mother ganges river
in the sub-tropical himalayan foothills

i had determined it was time to replenish
my supply of apples, oranges and bananas
feeling energetic and adventurous
i took myself across the eighth of a mile walk-bridge
to the "unholy" opposite riverbank
intent on checking out the marketplace
situated along a winding escalating path
lined with various market stalls and street-side services
which began immediately
at the foot of the bridge's other side

just at the base of the incline
stood a massive expansive tropical tree
some twenty-five meters in height
i happened to glance upward
to observe a troupe of monkeys
ten or twelve of them or so
collectively staring with much interest in my direction
from atop the tree branches

i shrugged and turned to continue along
leaving any thought of those curious monkeys
to drift away with the river's current
and the balmy sweet tropical breeze
it happened that the most delectible produce
was available in a quaint friendly stall
at the very top of the pathway
( in full view of those monkeys, by the way )

success....mission accomplished !

feeling quite pleased with my purchase
i began a relaxed descent towards
returning to my lodgings

as if on cue
from some mystical comedy script
in some movie i wasn't aware of being in
and at the perfect dramatic moment
a stunning, young, blond, scandinavian woman
passed me heading the other way along the pathway

naturally and of course,
i stopped and turned to admire her radiant charms

suddenly, out of the corner of my eye i saw him
the big bad boss monkey of that troupe i had seen
with the whole damn family not far behind

i froze in a state of....
i'm still not quite sure what....
but picture this if you will....

i was holding a bag of peanuts upright in my left hand
having been eating these freely with my right hand
and a common plastic market bag
with the day's fruit bonanza
dangling from the pinky finger
of the hand holding the peanuts

the boss monkey charged
with extreme malicious intent
huge impressive fangs bared
the troupe close behind

no doubt he intended to leave with his prize
no matter if he had to take my hand to do so

i agreed with him
he could have the fruit
he was welcome to the fruit
dammit, he and his family deserved the fruit
i was a mere pretender to their territorial rights

what occurred next seemed borne of an intuitive knowing
rather than any conscious decision
a still calm voice arose from within

" if you relax your pinky finger, you can save the peanuts !"

before i knew it, i had done just that
the mighty monkey boss had snared his booty
and with his scruffy band had scurried off satisfied
while i was still a two-fisted guy
with a monkey story to tell....including peanuts

as the gang of marauders hustled away
i became aware of a wonderful thing
there was that bag of tasty peanuts
still upright in my trembling hand

hallelujah !

and i most thoroughly enjoyed them
while muttering and chuckling away
throughout the rest of my uneventful stroll home

in retrospect....

i'm neither the first nor the last
wide-eyed, greenhorn tourist to come bumbling along
to have fallen for the well-oiled, well orchestrated scheme
of that clever troupe of larcenous primates

i'm still not sure how the blond bombshell
played into their racket
but she was in on it
i know it !

2013....vancouver island, canada
while shopping for produce this sunny may morning
i happened to spy a good deal on bananas
pensioner's instinct drew me straightaway to them
feeling quite self-satisfied as i reached for my prize

suddenly....
as if on cue....
perhaps the same mystical movie production
shades of india and those rascally monkeys
a pair of grubby, tobacco-stained, long-fingered hands shot out in front of me
and swooped up the bananas with a furious intent
there was no doubt i occupied the first spot in queue
there was no doubt that those bananas were to be mine
there was no doubt to anyone around or about
except for the woman who captured the banana bonanza
in her mind, they were hers long before i'd entered the scene
and....
in an instant she had paid for them and was gone....
much like those monkeys back in india times

upon reflection....

there wasn't much to be done
in each of these cases
but for time, location and species
what happened was one and the same

it didn't take long to get over my self
and conclude those bananas were hers along
i was a mere pretender to her territorial rights

i cannot begrudge her behavior and choices
just as i cannot begrudge those monkeys the same

p.s.....

come to think of it.....

that scurrilous banana-snatching woman of today
did somewhat resemble an older, more world-worn version
of that blonde babe from rishikesh

hmmm....