What i saw

What I saw;

Those eyes
once human,
from some other place,
of hell and murder.
No mercy.

That face,
once my father's,
now a savage beast
wanting only murder;
wanting only
that I should die.

What i smelled....

Stale tobacco,
rotting teeth,
rancid beer,
sharp stinking hatred;
that familiar reek
of dominance
and contempt

What i felt;

Burning drops of sweat,
sour spittle on my face.
Those giant hands
around my fragile throat;
squeezing,
squeezing,
too hard,
too long.

What i knew;

I was dying
at the hands of this imposter.
He who stole my father's shell;
this one who came from hell
to take my life away.

What i saw;

The tunnel closing in
to a bright white pinpoint.
This was it,
life was over,
I was dead

Or so i believed.

What i saw;

Upon awakening
a large stark shadow
looming ominous and dark
in that doorway.

What I heard;

Don't say anything....
or else !
in as stony cold a voice
I've ever heard.

What i knew;

I would never speak of this
or other acts of horror;
seen and heard there,
in that place I knew as home.
I would speak no more
of what I saw then,
what I heard then,
what I smelled then,
what I felt then.

I would not speak of anything
that could ever lead me back
to the brink of that fearful place;
I thought I had been cursed to
for eternity and beyond.

Most of all....

I would speak no more
of anything at all.

the mask i believe in

Today I don the mask of certainty
that I do not wear a mask at all.

Thus here I stand naked before you,
fully clothed in my latest disguise.

Winter's ice

I lay here frozen in silence
deep beneath the winter's ice.

Hope and faith now long departed
gone the way of autumn's leaves.

Spring seems but a broken promise
whispered on the summer's breeze.

read my lips

hey....you....

read my lips
you can't see 'em
but they're yappin'

these scrawled
word pictures
will have to do

what you think
i do this for ?

just to feel the breeze
of my own lips flappin' ?

well....
partly
yes !

but way down deep
somewhere deeper than
space/time herself
there's a primal urge
to scream out
from this ancient
dank and dingy cave
in a voice you'll never hear

hence these primitive scribbled markings

i won't be here
if or when this message finds you

still i trust you'll get the point

read my lips
you can't see 'em
but they're flappin'

these scrawled
word pictures
will have to do

one way street

the story of my life
seems to be a trail
of one way streets
leading to dead ends

what the deal is there
i still don't have a clue
it's always been my dime
and ne'er a thing from you

or you or you or you

oh poor pity me
whatever shall i do ?

bah...
humbug !

you want some flowery words ?

not here
not now
perhaps not ever

one thing is still certain
if you turn this way at all

what you see
is what you get

i won't dazzle you with charm
nor buy your silly games

as a wise old elder
from an ancient noble clan
advised one day long past

get real !
or get lost !

these words are offered freely
to you and you and you

and you !

He is waiting

He is waiting;
always waiting.
He has no plan,
doesn't need one.
He's lying in wait
around every corner
for that moment
when you least suspect.
He knows your weakness.
You won't see him.
He's too slick and shifty.
You can't stop him;
no point trying.

What you gonna do ?

Who you gonna call ?

business as usual

the high-falutin' corporate hoi polloi
of some officially designated executive branch
assigned to crucial and sensitive matters
regarding ridiculous meticulous specific particulars
convened an emergency ad-hoc huddle today
to urgently address a muddled-up kerfuffle
of extreme importance and far-reaching ramifications
for absolutely no-one at all

not to worry....

it's just business as usual

Sweet holy mother

Sweet holy mother of us all,
comfort me this mournful eve.
My weary soul cries out
I feel swallowed up by
what seems an endless plight.

Sweet holy mother of us all,
hold me to your tender bosom
and soothe this aching heart.

Sweet holy mother of us all,
please come to me this night;
so I might again rest peacefully
nestled in your divine embrace.